Friday, December 9, 2011

6th Christmas Toy Fair & Custom Car Show



What: "The 6th Christmas Toy Fair & 1st Philippine Die Cast & Custom Car Show"
When: Friday, Dec. 16 at 10:00am - Sunday, Dec. 18 at 9:00pm
Where: Megatrade Hall 1, 5th Level, Bldg. B, SM Megamall
toyconph.com
pinoytoykolektors.com

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Mountain-/Beachineering at Mt. Nagsasa & Cove



November 26: Our Saturday started off at the Victory Liner bus terminal in Caloocan, waiting for the other members of LUMOT* to arrive from their respective day jobs. Most of us just got off from our weekly grind--bringing backpacks to work, changing from office uniforms, and having quick dinners. By 12AM, after load distribution (dividing camping gear/food stuff among ourselves), all 13 of us piled into the first trip to Olongapo (P200 per head). Two and a half hours later, we were at the bus terminal in Subic, Zambales in the middle of the night. We hired a jeepney (P80 each) to bring us to the jump-off point at Sitio San Martin. For safety reasons, we had to register at the local police station and barangay hall. I don't know what the speed limit was in Brgy. Cawag, but our jeepney was moving at a funeral pace. I understand the place is hilly, with roads going up and down, but the driver seemed to have forgotten that there's a third pedal other than the clutch and brake. Later, we found out that the jerk didn't really know where the jump-off was and we were going in circles trying to look for the road's end. Good thing a tricycle driver saved our asses and we followed him to the jump-off site. Two and a half hours later, we finally hit the unpaved road and found ourselves at the tribal chieftain's doorsteps (Kap. Perla I think). We hired two of her Aeta guides (five hikers is to one, at P300 per guide), Old Man "Andy" and "Peter" the Deer Hunter (yup, usas and baboy-ramos still roam the area--at P300 a kilo). It also appeared we weren't the only ones who got lost, as there were other vehicles loaded with kasambundoks lining up even after 4AM--the ideal time of day to start the trek.



It was almost 6AM when we began walking. Our "fun climb" kicked off on level ground, going thru a path of reddish dirt/dry mud and big stones, bordered by dust-covered bushes of different heights (sometimes taller than us). After an hour, the trail started to slope downwards as the vegetation grew lesser in variety, mostly cogon grass. I was assigned at the tail end of the pack and was one of the designated "sweepers". At about half past eight, we were more than halfway up Mt. Nagsasa and enjoying the greenery of the nearby Cawag mountains--Balingkilat, Cinco Picos and Dayungan I think. Nagsasa is considered a minor climb, with 3/9 in the difficulty scale, a trail class of 1-2, and 450 MASL (meters above sea level). It was also getting cooler, a light drizzle here and there, and you could literally hear the wind blow--like someone playing bowling. We'd stop once in a while to catch our breaths and recharge under the overcast sky, considering some of us were newbies/oldies (but goodies). Another thing on catching one's breath, it was by fate that I had to do it more often than the others 'cuz I'm lagging behind Old Man Andy, whose vocabulary obviously didn't include the verb "bathe". Come to think of it, for once I'm free from the stink of civilization and consumer culture: deodorant, perfume, hand sanitizer, mouthwash, lotion, shampoo, hair conditioner, soap. But not all, 'cuz every now and then, I had to pick up some litter left by unmindful campingers (not us of course) who didn't abide by the basic LNT (leave no trace) rule.



By 9AM, we were at the narrow ridge near the summit where only one person could walk at a time. One false move or lose your balance and you'd find yourself plummeting/rolling down the steep slope like the Balrog/Gandalf in the Lord of the Rings. Owing to my heavy backpack and the wind blowing against my side (coupled with fear of heights), I had to grab on to the grass and do a semi-4WD (four-wheel drive, climbing on all-fours using hands and feet) to achieve vertical position until I reached the "saddle". Heaving a sigh of relief, I was greeted by the scenic view of Nagsasa Cove--blue waters, white beach and all--and discovered the origin of the expression, "very near yet so far". If sorting spreadshit, err, sheet data in ascending order is giving you a problem in Excel, wait 'til you get to the descending part. Basagan ng tuhod, as they say. Wearing only my trusty old sandals over leg warmers and toe socks ('cuz it's a fun climb right? operative word is "fun"), the descent somehow took its toll on my knees and rearranged my ankles. Remind me to bring along mid-cut hiking shoes next time! Anyway, once we got back to level ground, the traction got better and the vegetation too, save for heaven above. What was once cool and cloudy, gave way to clear blue skies and the midday sun--which explains why it's best to start very early at 0400H.



An hour and a half into the downward trek, we found ourselves cooling off and sticking our faces in crystalline waters, drinking gallons from an ever-flowing stream. Ah, the grandeur of nature--no bottled mineral water or energy drink can beat. There were supposed to be around four river/stream crossings on the trail I think, but thanks to climate change and the dry spell, we were greeted by rocks instead. By 11AM, stones and soil gave way as sand crunched beneath my feet. Twenty minutes later, my heart rate finally slowed down as my nostrils took in the warm breeze of the beach. Welcome to Nagsasa Cove. We unpacked our gear, pitched tents, and cooked. If you thought camping food had to rhyme with canned goods, we beg to differ. For the next two meals, we had sinigang na sugpo/baboy, kaldereta, pinakbet, pansit, liempo, atbp., along with the staple instant noodles and cold cuts.



Unlike the neighboring Anawangin Cove, Nagsasa has a smaller (and calmer) shoreline which is deeply cut, so there are no worries of big waves hitting the beach. Other than a few tribal huts/outhouses (P100 per person) and three comfort rooms with running (mountain) water via rubber hose, human structure and electricity are virtually non-existent, so we had to use our headlamps while eating supper. With the exception of some flies during the next morning, we didn't encounter any untoward insect either, not even mosquitoes. Later in the afternoon, our motley crew took to the beach like an alcoholic to gin--splashing about in the cold, clear, dikya-free seawater--and goofed around on the off-white sand until the last light drained. There's also a fresh water cove nearby and a hidden falls somewhere, but we were tired playing Indiana Jones. After dinner by battery light--complete with background (cell phone) music, we got a bonfire started and roasted hotdogs, kikiam and marshmallows--downing them all with our poison of choice: Emperador Light. By 11PM, lights were out.



November 27: Everything looked soft and out of kilter on Sunday morning, thanks to a slight hangover. Nothing a hot can of black coffee, pritong tuyo, sinangag, and yesterday's leftovers can't handle. One last dip after breakfast and we were all packed and ready to go, all our trash placed neatly in a black plastic bag. By 11AM, Max the Boatman fetched us (P300 per pax) and ferried us off. After an hour of riding the rolling waves (think roller coaster ride without wheels), we reached Pundaquit by 12 noon, took a tricycle (P30 per passenger) to the town proper, and were off to Manila an hour later.



November 28: "I Don't Like Mondays" was playing in my head but I couldn't remember the other lyrics. I owe the Boomtown Rats some fan mail and I walk with a slight limp--Alaxan anyone? I was back to the pig-fattening pen that is my office cubicle and I wasn't even late. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go to the pantry for brewed coffee.



*League of Unified Mountaineers (Outdoorsmen - unofficial 'cuz sexist) and Trekkers

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Nardong Tae #1

Click to read

Inilabas ang sama ng loob noong 2003, isa itong pinoy alt/indie/undie* comix na naiskor ko nung trip ko pang tumambay sa Tandem/Cartimar-Recto. Binibigyang-buhay nito ang mga kasabihan sa Ingles na "shit happens" at "just a pile of shit" (literally). Tila napapanahon sapagka't patok sa takilya ngayon ang angkang nagpasikat sa karakter ni Nardong Putik--ang orihinal na utak-pulbura! Maraming salamat sa mga taeng, este, taong nasa likod ng Abang Guard Prod. Inc. Mabaho kayo! Ah, mabuhay pala kayo! ;)

I-click ang litrato para mabasa ang nilalaman o di kaya'y pumunta sa http://www.scribd.com/collections/3595863/

*alternative/independent/underground

(created by Louie Cordero--a multi-awarded painter, illustrator and musician--Nardong Tae was named "Best Indie Comic Book" at the 2nd Philippine Comic Book, Anime and Gaming Convention held on 13-14 December 2003 at SM Megamall's Megatrade Hall 2)

Best Present Ever



Thursday, November 10, 2011

Living in letters #1

I'm waxing nostalgic, but does anyone handwrite letters anymore? Before texting and the internet, I used to typewrite letters--long ones, cuz my handwriting sucks--and send postcards to friends (and significant others). Somehow, the handwritten word is intimate in a way that the web or cellphone (keyboard-/keypad-written word) will never be. Penmanship is a very personal thing (cursive especially), along with sealing the envelope and going to the post office to snail mail it. Like a photograph, a letter is a snapshot of what was happening to someone at their moment of writing it. Unlike email and this blog post, a letter has a feeling of permanence--you can touch it, smell it, fold-unfold it (or rip it). So starting with this, I'll be posting some of the paper products that wound their way into the rusty old mailbox outside our gate. It's sad that technology has robbed us of that simple pleasure of writing letters the hard way. My kid may never have a clue on what's it like licking a stamp--and covering it all over with Elmer's glue (for recycling purposes, so the blue postmarks would easily come off after being dipped in warm water with Clorox bleach)...or maybe I'm just romanticizing.







M a.k.a. F was our idiotor-in-chief back in the day, and I was her ass-o-shit ed. She's now a successful architect.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Space Battleship Yamato, Star Blazers (QuickieComics.com)

http://quickiecomics.com

Even at an early age, I was a fan of Japanese science fiction: monster movies, super robot cartoons, and live-action film. Like so many kids in the 80s, I rushed home every day after school to watch my favorite space opera (no, not Flordeluna!), Leiji Matsumoto's Space Battleship Yamato (a.k.a. Star Blazers in the Philippines/US). The ship was the historical World War 2 Yamato that was sunk, rebuilt and renamed the "Argo" in the English-dubbed SB, after the ship of Jason and the Argonauts. Star Blazers was my first real exposure to drama and mature themes. It explored the full spectrum of human emotions and told about personal tragedy, death/fallen comrades, and the extinction faced by humanity due to alien invasion (by the Gamilons). Along with Mobile Suit Gundam (a subject for another blog post), SB was more than an action-oriented animated series, for it paved the way for arc-based and plot-driven anime. Looking back, it saddens me to see my seven-year-old watching second-rate cartoons today--animated shows that are all special effects, color and sounds, with no real thought or soul behind them, just to keep kids glued to the telly. Truly I grew up in the golden age of animation and am thankful for that. Now if I could only find my way to Iscandar and blow our cable TV with that Wave Motion Gun. http://quickiecomics.com

Monday, October 17, 2011

V-Boy



Vocabulary-Boy and all related characters in "G-Man & Friends Proudly Present" are trademarks and ©opyleft Zernain Villain 2011 Philippines.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Motorcycle Diaries #1



This is me homeward bound and semi-stoned out of my senses (thanks to Colt 45, GSM Blue, Empe Light, etc.) at 60-70kph, 2am on a Sunday, somewhere in Baliwag after rocking out at my friend's (Maestro Dante "Parak") 40th birthday bash/concert where the entrance fee is noodles, a kilo of rice, canned goods, or a pack of biscuits for the Bulacan flood victims. Truly, growing old is cool (old school) and I'm not far behind.

(video taken with my lo-tech camphone, soundtrack by the Ramones)







Photo by Dana Vergara

Thursday, October 13, 2011

English for Young-Thinks



Grammar-Man and all related characters in "G-Man & Friends Proudly Present" are trademarks and ©opyleft Zernain Villain 2011 Philippines.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

The Avengers* (QuickieComics.com)

http://quickiecomics.com At home: Marvel Legends Hulk, Iron Man, Captain America, Nick Fury & Thor


Teaser


Final poster


At work: Marvel Select War Machine, IM, Thor & Cap Am waiting for MS Hulk + Hawkeye


Coming to the big screen this 2012: computer-generated Hulk, Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark/IM, Chris Evans as Steve Rogers/Cap Am, Samuel Jackson as Nick Fury, and Chris Hemsworth as Thor.

*Articulated Comic Book Art http://quickiecomics.com

Collecticon 2011



What: Hobbiworx & PinoyToyKolektors.com present "Collecticon 2011"
When: Saturday, Oct. 8 at 10:00am - Sunday, Oct. 9 at 9:00pm
Where: Robinsons Midtown Mall Atrium, Ermita
Admission: FREE

Saturday, September 3, 2011

AK-47: The People's Choice

Question: What do the BHB* (a.k.a. NPA), the late Osama Bin Laden, and me have in common?
Answer: Well, aside from being freaks (BHB = war freak, Bin Laden = bomb freak, Zernain Villain = toy freak), all of us love the AK-47...or a certain version of it.



Built in the former USSR** after WW2 (second World War), the original fixed-wooden stock AK-47 (Avtomat Kalashnikova) or "Kalash" in Russian slang, entered active service in select units of the Soviet army in 1947, hence the name. Two years later, the "AK" was officially accepted by the Soviet Armed Forces and was used by many Warsaw Pact countries.



The AK was one of the first true "assault rifles" ever made, based on the German StG44 (Sturmgewehr 1944). During WW2, the Nazis pioneered the assault rifle concept after research showing that most firefights happen at close range--around 300 meters, thus the term CQB (close-quarters battle/combat). Since the firepower and effective range of rifles at that time were excessive for CQBs, Hitler's SS stormtroopers sought a firearm combining SMG (submachine gun) features like a high-capacity magazine and selective fire (semi or full automatic) with an intermediate-range cartridge.



Thus, the StG44 was born. Towards the end of WW2, the Germans fielded their StG44s against the Russians and the commies stole the idea. Initially designed for ease of operation and repair by glove-wearing Soviet soldiers in the Arctic zones (hence the Cold War--joke!), the AK's large gas piston, generous clearances between moving parts, and tapered cartridge-case design allow it to endure large amounts of foreign matter and fouling without failing to cycle.



However, its reliability comes at the cost of accuracy, as the AK's looser tolerances don't allow for precision targeting and consistency. The rifle is meant to be part of massed infantry fire and not for long-range engagements. This can be experienced if you're into playing "Guerilla Warfare" in the first-person shooter CS (CounterStrike) computer game, where the AK (CV-47) is the default firearm of "terro"(rist) forces.



With its low production cost and an average service life of 20 to 40 years--depending on the extreme weather conditions (hot, muddy, wet or frozen) to which it has been exposed--the AK remains as the most widely used assault rifle of eastern European nations, Third World armies, revolutionary peoples in Asia, and terrorist organizations worldwide.



Case in point, the gun at the center of the BHB's "tatsulok" (triangle) logo on top of the native "sibat" (spear) is an AK-47. Though our "kasamas" (comrades) would much rather use M-16 armalite rifles, courtesy of their good government friends in the playing field and their money-making commanders/ generals from the other side of the fence.



Regarding Bin Laden's famed weapon of choice, it's a "shortened" (Ukorochennyj) barrel design (which can't be fitted with a bayonet) with a bakelite mag and a "folding" (Skladnoy) metal shoulder stock--thus the name AKS-74U. Whereas the original AK-47 has a 7.62mm cartridge, the variant AK-74 only has a caliber of 5.45mm. No matter, they both produce significant wounding effects when the projectile tumbles and fragments in your tissues...but produce relatively minor wounds if the bullet exits your body. It is unofficially known as the "Ksyukha" in the former Soviet bloc and as the "Krinkov" in the U.S.--apparently coined by the "mujaheedins" during the Russian invasion of Afghanistan in the '80s.



As for my airsoft weapon of choice, it's a modified Marui AK-47 Beta-Spetsnaz (KGB Special Forces). Unlike Osama's AK which allows it to be carried under car seats or even to be concealed under one's clothes, the B-Spetsnaz's fixed/full stock (containing the BIG but long-lasting battery) and detachable long silencer (Tishina?) can somewhat get in the way. Anyhow, with its compact size, very little gear whine, BBs (ball bearings originally, now plastic pellets) firing in a smooth steady stream, and short/long hi-cap mags, it’s easy to go prone with the Spetz--not to mention run through the thickest of brush without getting tangled on anything, thanks to the gun strap/sling.



There's just one letdown. With the massive amount of metal Marui used in the Spetz's construction, there's more metal in it than there is in my uncle's '70 Boss Mustang or Black Sabbath! Whatever, all this metal makes for one extremely solid and HEAVY gun--no creaking, no plastic-on-plastic contact, all parts fitting snugly, just like the real thing. What else can I say, it's a Marui AK: shoots great, black & gray finish, rust err lasts forever!



Note: The RED barrel safety cap has nothing to do with one being a commie ok?



More firearms reviews soon!



Stay stoned, err, tuned!



*Bagong Hukbong Bayan/New People's Army, also No Permanent Address (in the Philippines)
**Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, "socialist" not being the operative word

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Transportmers: Dark of the Moon Craters at BGC*



This is the roller-coaster ride poor jeepney drivers and working-class commuters have to put up with every single day in this hidden side of Gate 1, *Bonifacio Global City-slash-The Fort. In summer, the place turns into a bleeding desert with the air so thick you can actually see-and choke on-it! During rainy season, the place becomes a bloody mud pit swallowing light vehicles whole! At night it's pitch black. On the left side, you'll notice a high steel fence which divides the haves and the have-nots. For on that other side is a newly built and well-lighted concrete road where only private vehicles are allowed to pass.

(video taken with my lo-tech camphone on the way home, soundtrack by the Juan Dela Cruz Band)

Monday, August 1, 2011

The Young-Think Trio

They say, two's company but three's a crowd. I say, three's a lot of fun! In religion (be it pagan, Wiccan or Christian), the number three has a long history of mythical associations according to influential psychologist Carl Jung. The "power of three" is often symbolized by a triquetra (three-cornered) -- a Celtic pattern that shows the center of three connected circles, sometimes bound together by a fourth one in the center. Hence the dumb question: If two's company and three's a crowd, then what's four? Anyway, just as two heads are better than one, I've compiled here a short list of three's from popular culture:
  1. the Holy Trinity (God the Father/mind, the Son/body, and the Holy Spirit/soul) and other triple deities

  2. the basic family (father, mother and child -- MY family)

  3. from fairy tales to nursery rhymes to Illustrated Classics: "The Three Little Pigs," "The Three Blind Mice," "The Three Musketeers"

  4. the Hecate (Phoebe or the moon in heaven, Diana on earth, and Persephone in hell), also known as the Triple Goddess* (Maiden, Mother and Crone)

  5. Alfred Hitchcock's film "Vertigo" uses the triple goddess as motif

  6. Vertigo comics featured the Kindly Ones (triple goddess) in Neil Gaiman's "The Sandman" series

  7. Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger

  8. the Triskelion (three bent human legs, popularized locally by the fratboys of Tau Gamma Phi)

  9. but misinterpreted as a swastika by Nazi Germany's Third Reich 'cuz Adolf Hitler can't count!

  10. a triquetra is one of the four symbols on Led Zeppelin's fourth album "IV"

  11. a triquetra is also seen on the hammer "Mjolnir" in the recent Thor movie

  12. the Three Stooges (Moe, Larry and Curly) and their local counterparts Tito, Vic and Joey plus the Tatlong Itlog

  13. legends of Pinoy rock: Juan Dela Cruz Band's "Himig Natin" album lineup in the 70s (Wally Gonzales, Mike Hanopol and Pepe Smith)

  14. Wuds, Dead Ends (80s three-piece Pinoy punk/hardcore pioneers) and The Youth (90s Pinoy alternative rockers)

  15. Venom's classic black-metal lineup (Cronos, Mantas and Abaddon)

  16. and from grunge to pop punk: Nirvana, Green Day, Blink-182

  17. Getter Robo 1-2-3 (the first mecha/super robot combiner)

  18. the Young-Think Trio (Lego Minifigure Punk Rocker, Tech Deck Dude Syd, and Guitar Hero Johnny Napalm)



*their masculine counterpart being the Horned God, a good subject for another post

Articulated Comic Book Art (A.C.B.A.)

Magandang araw! Good day! I'm pleased that you took the time to visit my spot again. I'm very happy to have started this new segment which is about the three things that I really like: toys, cartoons and comic books. As the title implies, A.C.B.A. is dedicated to the kid in all of us. Growing up poor in a Third World country, I only had a few toys and comics back then, aside from stuff that I crudely made out of product cartons/styrofoam and roughly drew on the back of used paper. Nonetheless, I was blessed in having a family (thanks to my loving tatay/pop, nanay/mom and utol/kid bro) that supported and understood the abnoy/mental retardate in me. I had the luck of completing my education (despite spending an eternity in college and grad school) and landing a job (that barely pays the bills, thanks to my loving wife and son). And most of the time have food on the table three times a day and still have some money left to pursue a hobby without going broke (now this is a big joke!). But then I realized that not all of my fellow Pinoys have such experiences and are as lucky. Because of this, I took it upon myself to give (a finger) back to society in the very little way I can by making A.C.B.A. I want to share my life-long journey as a punk rocker and toy collector with you. Of course, I will be more than willing to accept your experiences, thoughts and comments on my posts. Aside from your ideas, financial contributions and toy donations will also be very much appreciated. I hope you will continue to visit me, see you again soon at maraming salamat! Thanks!

Young-Think

young-think - (noun) 1. a so-called grown-up who doesn't act his age (see the Descendents'/Ramones' song, "I Don't Wanna Grow Up"); 2. who is into forms of entertainment that are usually associated with children like toys, cartoons, comic books, and video games; 3. dresses more like a teenager than an adult; 4. may not be a great parent, but doesn't forget to pay the bills; 5. sa Tagalog, "batang-isip".

synonyms: kidult, adultescent, young-at-heart, Peter Pan, Bondying

sentence: "A young-think has neither past nor future, for he writes in the present tense. He enjoys the here and now, which very few grown-ups do. His childhood may be long over, but that doesn't mean his play time is."

motto: When I grow up I wanna be a little boy.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Joy Division's "Love Will Tear Us Apart"

When routine bites hard
And ambitions are low
And resentment rides high
But emotions won't grow
And we're changing our ways
Taking different roads

Love, love will tear us apart again

Why is the bedroom so cold?
Turned away on your side
Is my timing that flawed?
Our respect runs so dry
Yet there's still this appeal
That we've kept through our lives

(But) love, love will tear us apart again

Do you cry out in your sleep?
All my failings exposed
And there's a taste in my mouth
As desperation takes hold
Yet is it something so good?
Just can't function no more

Love, love will tear us apart again

Smashing Pumpkins' "Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness" + "Tonight, Tonight"

Time is never time at all
You can never ever leave, without leaving a piece of youth
And our lives are forever changed
We will never be the same
The more you change the less you feel

Believe, believe in me, believe, believe!
That life can change, that you're not stuck in vain
We're not the same, we're different

Tonight, tonight, tonight
So bright
Tonight, tonight

And you know you're never sure
But you're sure you could be right
If you held yourself up to the light
And the embers never fade, in your city by the lake
The place where you were born

Believe, believe in me, believe, believe!
In the resolute urgency of now
And if you believe there's not a chance tonight

Tonight, tonight, tonight
So bright
Tonight, tonight

We'll crucify the insincere tonight (tonight)
We'll make things right, we'll feel it all tonight (tonight)
We'll find a way to offer up the night (tonight)
The indescribable moments of your life (tonight)
The impossible is possible tonight (tonight)
Believe in me as I believe in you

Tonight, tonight, tonight
Tonight, tonight

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Brand New Cherry Mobile Q7 Review



Price: not worth it (sayang lang ang pera mo!)
Features (common to MOST models out-of-the-box): operating system hangs, non-working keys/applications, emergency/no SIM, drained fully charged battery, blinking white screen, dead unit, etc. (kahit techie sasakit ang ulo!)
Signal: very weak to NO signal, dropped/missed calls, text messages unsent/unreceived (ubos na nga load mo, magagalit pa contacts mo!)
Parts/battery: NOT available locally, had to be ordered from China (mamumuti mata mo kakahintay--that is, kung may stock pa!)
Service: useless/busy contact numbers, back jobs, long lines of angry customers, NO money-back guarantee (if it's any consolation: di ka nag-iisa, marami kayong naloko este pabalik-balik pala--yung iba nga nag-undertime/nag-absent pa o galing ng probinsiya!)
Bottom line: DON'T BUY Cherry Mobile! (bulok ang produkto! palpak ang serbisyo!)
Rating: 0/10, shooting star (makakabaril ka ng tao!)

Note: background music (Gang of Four's "Damaged Goods") blocked by YouTube due to copyright issues--fuck big business!

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Jesus H. Christ

On Palm Sunday
(originally posted by Hippie Commie in his Facebook notes on 28 March 2010)

Fuck authority! Ito ang ipinakita ng simpleng tambay na si Jesus H.* Christ ngayong Linggo ng Palaspas nang mag-gatecrash siya (literally) sa templong sentro ng established religion na pinamumunuan ng burgis na si Caiaphas. Itinaon mismo ni JHC sa panahon ng Passover ang kanyang pagdating kaya't nabulabog ang katahimikan nang biglang magpiyesta ang masa sa pagsalubong sa kanya. Binatikos ni JHC ang panghihingi ng buwis ng simbahan sa mga taong required na maghugas sa mga paliguan bago pumasok sa templo (among many other things hehehe). Tinira rin niya ang pagbabawal ng simbahan na makapasok sa "banal" na templo ang mga taong may kapansanan, may regla, may sakit, atbp. dahil madudumi o "impure" raw kasi--na siyang mga naging tropa ni JHC noong buhay pa siya. Kaya di nakapagtatakang ang mga bodyguard ng high priest na si Caiaphas ang mismong humuli sa kanya sa hardin ng Gethsemane bilang ganti. (itutuloy...natatawa ako hi-hi-*Hippie)





On Holy Thursday, Good Friday & Black Saturday
(originally posted by HC in his FB notes on 4 April 2010)

Jesus H.* Christ dead! Parang Sid Vicious tshirt at headline sa tabloid. Naisip ko tuloy balikan yung mga libro ko dati sa liberation theology, at panoorin muli ang BBC-Discovery channel TV docu na "JHC-The Real Story" na available na sa piratang DVD hehehe. At eto ang ilang mga bagay na bumulabog sa natutulog kong isipan hinggil sa pagkatao ng idol kong si JHC:

Bagamat nagsimula ang ginagamit nating kalendaryo sa kapanganakan ni JHC, hindi siya ipinanganak noong 1st century A.D. kundi 5 B.C. dahil na rin sa engot magbilang yung gumawa nito. At ano ang mayroon nang mga panahong iyon? Kung mahilig kang magbasa ng horoscope tulad ng 3 wise men--na mga astrologers by the way, madidiskubre mo na ang sinasabing star of Bethlehem ay walang iba kundi ang planetang Jupiter (simbolo ng royalty) na nagkaroon ng conjunction o pag-iisa sa Saturn (isa pang simbolo ng royalty) sa constellation ng Aries (tupa na simbolo ni JHC at mga Jews) na sinabayan pa ng kung ilang lunar eclipses. Ang mga astronomical events na ito ay nagbabadya lamang ng kapanganakan ng isang matinding hari at ito ay naganap bandang buwan ng Marso, 5 B.C.



Partygoer si JHC nung nabubuhay pa siya. Bakit siya iimbitahin sa isang kasalan sa Cana sa Galilee kung hindi? Di lang yun, kasama pa niya buong tropa--pati nanay niya. At nang magkaubusan ng inumin (hard man yun o beer) ginawang wine ni JHC ang 6 na tapayan ng tubig. Hindi lang basta wine, kundi "good" wine na nakalalasing. Mas mababa kase ang alcohol content ng "poor" at mahinang klaseng wine. Nakipag-inuman din si JHC kay Levi at sa mga tax collectors kaya tuloy nasabihan siya ng mga Pharisees na bumabarkada sa mga "sinners". Sagot naman niya: "It's not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick." Bukod dito, di ba't wine ang chaser nila JHC sa Last Supper?

Barrier breaker si JHC dahil binasag niya ang mga nakaugalian nang paniniwala at prejudices ng mga tao. Bakit kamo? Sino namang matinong titser ang pipili ng mga tiwaling tax collectors, mga mangingisdang no-read no-write, mga tambay, atbp. bilang mga alalay? Sa parable niyang "Good Samaritan," isang Samaritano ang tumulong sa isang Hudyo na di lang estranghero kundi mortal pa nitong kaaway. Di lang ito tungkol sa pagtulong sa nangangailangan, kundi loving your enemy. At sinu-sino pa ang kinalinga ni JHC? Mga Hentil o di-Kristiyano, mga puta, mga paralitiko, mga may kapansanan, mga ketongin, mga sinasapian, mga retarded (tulad ko hehehe)--in other words, ang mga itinuturing na "impure" at outcast ng simbahan noon.



Contrary sa mga nakagisnan na nating paintings at pelikula tungkol kay JHC tuwing Semana Santa, hindi siya tisoy, hawasan ang mukha, at long hair--di siya cute at artistahin sa madaling salita. Ito'y dala na rin ng mga pintor na gumuhit sa kanya na ibinase ang kanyang itsura sa kanilang kultura. Kahapon ay nagbisita-iglesia nga kami ng mag-ina ko at noon ko lang nakita ang kulay itim na Kristong nakapako sa cathedral ng Plaridel at gayun din ang higanteng si "Apo" na may pasan na krus sa isang bisita sa Lugam. Sa ginawang facial reconstruction kay JHC sa BBC-Discovery dokyu, tumambad sa akin ang isang mamang malapad ang noo, pangahan, maitim, malaki ang ilong, maraming wrinkles, halos naka-afro, at mukhang mas matanda sa kanyang edad. Ito'y dala na rin siguro ng init sa Middle East, hirap ng trabaho doon, at pagiging Palestino.

Commie si JHC at ito'y makikita sa Acts of the Apostles: "They held everything in common, they would sell their (private) property and possessions and make a general distribution as the need of each required." Para bang "from each according to his ability, to each according to his need" ni pareng Marx. Binanggit din ni JHC na "if you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, then come, follow me" sa Matthew; "the man with two clothes should share with him who has none, and the one who has food should do the same" sa Luke; at "suppose someone is without clothes and daily food, if you say to him, 'Go, I wish you well, keep warm and well fed,' but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?" sa James. Kunsabagay, walang naiwang ari-arian si JHC--ultimo yung kanyang damit ay pinitik at pinagsugalan.



Tulad ng nabanggit ko noong Palm Sunday, radikal si JHC. Wala sanang problema kung naglakad lang siya papasok sa templo ng Jerusalem tulad ng ibang tao. Ang siste, sumakay pa siya sa isang donkey at sa east gate mismo ng templo pumasok bilang pagtupad na rin sa hula ni Zechariah hinggil sa darating na "messiah" o "christ"--liberator o the (anointed) one sabi nga sa Matrix the movie. Dahil nga Passover, may tensyon sa pagitan ng mga Hudyo at Romano. Isipin niyo na lang ang sitwasyon sa Pinas noong panahon ng Kastila. Di lang yan, pumasok pa si JHC sa loob ng templo, dumampot ng latigo, at itinaob ang mesa ng mga money changers bilang protesta sa kalakarang palitan ng perang "impure" sa "temple" money--sa ilalim ng purity laws. Kumbaga, para kang pumunta sa harap ng U.S. embassy at sinindihan ang bandila ng Amerika.

Lover boy si JHC at kung napanood niyo ang the Da Vinci Code, alam niyo na ang tinutukoy kong naging syota niya, kundi man kabiyak. Syempre walang iba kundi si Mary Magdalene na "apostle to the apostles" o ang siyang pinakamalapit kay JHC at 13th disciple niya. Salungat uli sa nakagisnan na natin, hindi puta o prosti si Magdalena. Siya ay biktima lamang ng historical na paninirang-puri dahil na rin sa ang nag-translate ng modernong Bibliya ay mga lalakeng walang asawa at matatandang binatang mongha--patriarchal kumbaga. Ito rin ang dahilan kung bakit pilit na pinabubulaanan ng simbahan ang gospel of Mary na sinulat niya, gaya rin ng pagsasaisantabi nito sa gospel of Judas, Dead Sea scrolls, atbp. Sino nga bang babae ang itataya ang buhay at pupunta sa crucifixion ni JHC habang ang lahat ay nagsipagtago na, kundi asawa?



Hindi naghudas si Judas. Una, si Judas lamang ang tinawag na "friend" ni JHC tulad ng pagtawag niya ng "beloved" kay Magdalene. Pangalawa, bilang treasurer ng grupo, si Judas ang karaniwang naaatasang magbayad ng temple tax tuwing dumadayo sila sa Jerusalem kaya siya rin ang pinakamadikit sa high priest na si Caiaphas--liaison officer kumbaga. Pangatlo, at ayon na rin sa gospel of Judas at documentary film ng National Geographic na pinanood ko rin, sinunod lamang niya ang utos ni JHC sa kanya na i-handover siya sa mga awtoridad. Ito ay para na rin makaharap ni JHC si Caiaphas. Di ba't sabi nga niya kay Judas sa last supper: "What you must do, do quickly?” Ang 30 piraso ng silver ay pabuya o SOP (standard operating procedure) sa sinumang nagta-turnover ng tao tulad na lamang pag nagtimbre ka ng isang wanted o kumpanyang may pirated software. Kung guilty si Judas, bakit siya magbibigti?

Ang crucifixion ay parusa ng Roman empire sa mga akusadong pulitikal at hindi sa basta lamang kriminal. Si Jeremiah ay namatay sa pamamagitan ng pagbato, si John the Baptist ay pinugutan ng ulo. Bagamat mas pinili ni JHC ang non-violence at passive resistance, hindi maitatatwa na kinalaban niya ang palakad ng estado at relihiyon, tulad ng ginawa ni Gandhi ng India sa British empire. Dahil dito, kinasuhan si JHC ng sedisyon at blasphemy. Ipinako si JHC sa isang olive tree na pinagkrus sa pasan niyang pahabang kahoy--hindi ready-made ok. Nakakatawa lang isipin na kung namatay pala si JHC sa pamamagitan ng firing squad o kaya'y electric chair e di baril o silya ang simbolo natin sa altar. At sa halip na magkrus ay itututok natin ang ating hintuturo sa ulo. Kabalintunaan din na ang mga Romanong kumitil ng buhay ni JHC ang siya ngayong nagpapalaganap ng kanyang pananampalataya. (to be concluded...natatawa ako hi-hi-*Hippie)





On Easter Sunday
(originally posted by HC in his FB notes on 5 April 2010)

Alive! Parang stickman tshirt ng Pearl Jam at pelikulang 3D na Avatar. Ano kaya kung hindi naganap ang resurrection ni Jesus H.* Christ? Malamang sa hindi, season 1 lang ang Bibliya (cancelled ang season 2 o New Testament), walang Easter bunny, wala ring Easter egghunt, at lalong hindi ako gigisingin ng mag-ina ko ng 4 a.m. ng madaling araw para ihatid sila at manood kami ng Salubong sa patio ng Barasoain. In other words, corny ang buhay kung walang Pasko ng Pagkabuhay. Ngunit ano nga ba ang pinatunayan ni JHC sa kanyang resurrection makaraan ang 3 araw niyang NDE (near-death experience)?

Tulad ni JHC, tayo ay mga spirit-souls sa ating materyal na katawan--we are not the body. "The body without the spirit is dead" sabi nga sa James, at "don't fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul" sa Matthew. Sa Bhagavad-Gita/ Vedas ng mga Hindu: "The soul can never be cut into pieces by any weapon, nor can be burned by fire." Kumbaga, ang spirit-soul ay maihahalintulad sa drayber o piloto, at ang katawan naman, sa kotse o eroplano. Kung mahilig kang manood ng anime, maituturing na si Amuro Ray ang spirit-soul at ang pinaaandar niyang Gundam (robot) ang katawan. Tulad ng lahat ng materyal na bagay sa mundo, nasisira at naluluma ang kotse at dinadala ito ng drayber sa kasa para ipagawa o--kung wala na talagang pag-asa--sa junk shop. Gaya ng minamaneho nating katawan: nagkakasakit, naoospital, tumatanda, at balang araw ay titirik din. Pero, tulad ni JHC, hindi tayo mamamatay kasama nito. Duh?



"For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal" sabi nga sa Corinthians. "For the living being there is neither birth nor death. Nor, having once been, does he ever cease to be. He is unborn, eternal, ever-existing, undying. He is not slain when the body is slain" ayon naman sa Gita/ Vedas. In short, kung nakinig ka lang sana sa iyong hayskul science teacher, law of conservation of mass and energy ang tawag diyan: "Energy is neither created nor destroyed, but can only be transformed." Tayo, bilang mga spirit-souls tulad ni JHC, ay gawa sa energy at hindi made in China ok? Kung idol mo si Luke Skywalker at fan ka ng Star Wars the movie, "life force" ang tawag sa atin. Maaaring mamatay o mabulok ang ating pisikal na katawan pero tayo, bilang enerhiya, ay patuloy na mabubuhay at, tulad ng drayber, maaaring magpalit ng bagong modelong sasakyan (body) kung di pa natin trip mag-round trip sa ating pinagmulan. Saan yun? Sabi nga sa Star Wars: "May 'the Force' be with you always." Ano/ Sino yun?

"God created man in his own image and likeness" sabi nga sa Genesis. Naitanong ko dati sa aking sarili: Kung ganun e bakit may pinapanganak na mahirap-mayaman? pangit-maganda? babae-lalake? kumpleto-may kapansanan? nognog-tisoy? Naisip ko na sa pisikal na katawan o panlabas ako nakatingin--may diskriminasyon. Kumbaga, sa modelo ng kotse sa halip na sa drayber sa loob nito. Kung spirit-souls tayo at kapareho natin si God, masasabi nating ang supreme being ang super-soul o great spirit--at tayo'y mga "sparks" lamang ng isang malaking sunog/ apoy. Dahil summer ngayon, isipin mo na lang nasa beach ka habang kumukutsara ng tubig-alat mula sa dagat. Di ba't ang katangian at lasa ng tubig-alat sa kutsara ay kapareho rin ng sa napakalawak na ocean? Kung ganun, wala nga tayong pinagkaiba kay God at sa bawa't isa. Nagkakaiba-iba lang tayo sa pisikal na katawan o damit na ating isinusuot tuwing tayo'y (muling) ipinapanganak. Kadalasan pa, napagkakamalan natin ang ating damit na suot bilang tayo o self, sa halip na yung spirit-soul na may suot nito. Ok ba soulmate?



"No one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again (literally)" sabi nga sa John. Di ba't si JHC na rin ang nag-confirm na si John the Baptist ang mismong reincarnation ("to be made flesh again") ng propetang si Elijah sa Matthew? Sa Koran ng mga Muslim: "You were dead, and he brought you back to life. He shall cause you to die, and shall bring you back to life, and in the end shall gather you unto himself." Sa Zohar naman ng Cabala: "The souls must re-enter the absolute substance whence they emerged. But to accomplish this, they must develop all the perfections, and if they have not fulfilled this condition during one life, they must commence another, a third, and so forth, until they have acquired the condition which fits them for reunion with God." At sa Gita/ Vedas ng India: "As the embodied self continually passes in this body from boyhood to youth to old age, the self similarly passes into another body at death." Scientific ito dahil ayon sa medisina, kada 5 taon ay napapalitan ng bago ang lahat ng atom (as in all) ng ating pisikal na katawan bunga ng metabolism--paghaba ng buhok at kuko, pagpapawis, paglilibag, pag-ihi, pagtae, pagbabate, atbp. Kumbaga, wala ni isang atom sa katawan mo ngayon ang nandiyan 5 years ago. Kung wala na pala ang ating dating katawan, bakit nag-eexist pa rin tayo? Simple lang, i-divide mo sa 5 ang edad mo ngayon at malalaman mo kung ilang beses ka ng nag-reincarnate bilang spirit-soul dito pa lang sa lifetime na ito. Believe it or not.

Mabilis ang balik ng karma ("action" o "deed") sabi nga: "A person reaps what he sows" ayon sa Galatians. Ito ang "wheel of nature" sa James at ang golden rule sa Luke: "Do to others as you would have them do to you." Sa John, tinanong si JHC: "Who did sin, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" Muli, kung nakinig ka lang sana sa hayskul science teacher mo, Newton's 3rd law of motion ang tawag diyan: "To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction." Maaaring nakaisa si Hitler sa lifetime na ito pero marami pa namang susunod hehehe. Sabi nga sa Srimad Bhagavatam ng Vedas: "According to his previous work, the living entity must capture another body before giving up the one he has. This is because the mind is the reservoir of all kinds of material desires." Ito ang universal principle/ cycle ng cause at effect (gulong ng palad wika nga). Teka, maiba ko. Ngayong tapos na naman ang Kuwaresma at lumang balita na ang pagkabuhay magmuli ni JHC, ano kaya ang puwede pa nating pag-tripan? May narinig ako, antayin na lang daw natin ang kanyang second coming. Duh?



Si JHC ay isang avatar ("appearance" o "descent" from heaven to earth). Kung napanood niyo ang pelikulang ito--sa sinehang 3D, piratang DVD o sa bus man, isipin niyo na lang na si Jake Sully ay parang si God, at ang kanyang Na'vi body ay si JHC na incarnation ng supreme being--ang pagkakaiba nga lang, di lang isa kundi marami ang naging incarnation ni JHC. Sabi nga sa Gita/ Vedas: "Whenever and wherever there is a decline in religious practice and a predominant rise of irreligion, at that time I descend myself...in order to deliver the pious and to annihilate the miscreants, as well as to re-establish the principles of religion, I advent myself millenium after millenium." Kung naaalala niyo pa yung sinabi kong matinding astronomical event na nangyari nang ipanganak si JHC, nagaganap lamang iyon isang beses sa humigit-kumulang 1,000 taon o sa loob ng isang millenium.

Kung ganun, hindi lang pala yun second coming ni JHC kundi pangatlo, pang-apat, panglima o baka nga pang ilang libo na dahil di lang naman earth ang nag-iisang planetang may buhay sa ating material universe. Sabi nga sa pelikulang Contact, "if it's just us then it seems like an awful waste of space" di ba? Anyway, dito na lang muna tayo mag-concentrate sa earth. Tanong: Sinu-sino ba ang mga naging importante at sikat na incarnations ni JHC bago siya naging siya? Sagot (in no particular order): si Amilius ng Atlantis, ang "son of man" o unang tao na si Adam, ang biblical na si Enoch, ang high priest na si Melchizedek, ang anak ni Jacob at naging prince of Egypt na si Joseph, ang nagdala sa mga Israelites sa Promised Land na si Joshua, ang music director nina David at Solomon na si Asaph, ang high priest na nag-compile ng Bibliya na si Jeshua, ang Egyptian na si Horus/ Amen-ra na anak ni Osiris at Isis, ang Hindu na si Krishna na nagdikta ng Gita kay Arjuna, ang Persian na si Mithra, ang tatay ni Zoroaster at nagsulat ng Zend Avesta na si Zend, at ang "anointed one" na si Buddha, among many others. Tanong nga ni JHC sa gospel of Thomas: "When you see a likeness of yourself, you are happy. But when you see your images that came into being before you, and that neither die nor become visible, how much will you be able to tolerate?"



Back to work na kaya wala na kong oras para ipakita rito ang pagkakahawig ng buhay at turo ng ilang mga nabanggit kong avatar sa naging life at teachings ni JHC. Tandaan lang natin na di lang Facebook ang meron sa internet, meron ding Google at Yahoo kaya kayo na ang bahalang mag-research hehehe. Sa huli, it's a matter of faith pa rin. Di kelangan ng isang Christian/ Catholic o atheist/ agnostic na maging Hindu o Buddhist, just as a Hindu/ Buddhist doesn't need to declare him/ herself a Christian or atheist or even as a Satanist para ma-appreciate ang magagandang turo ng ibang paniniwala. Sabi ko nga, panlabas na damit lang yan. Hindi tayo yan. At the end of the day, iisa lang naman ang tinutukoy nating God, iba-iba lang ang name (Yahweh, Govinda, Allah, Krishna, JHC, atbp.), salita (Bible, Koran, Bhagavad Gita, etc.) itsura, at trip niya. Naalala ko tuloy yung anak ko nang mapadaan kami sa simbahan ng Iglesia ni Kristo at magkrus siya: sabi ng mommy niya huwag at mali raw. Sabi naman ng daddy niya: sige lang anak, si God din ang nandiyan. (di na ko natatawa...naiihi na ko hi-hi-*Hippie)



Photos by Hippie Commie (Kapitangan, 2003)